Men and Shoes

Since jumping back into the dating scene (so weird to be back in the dating scene, btw), I have decided that dating men is a whole lot like shoe shopping.

First off, when shoe shopping, you have to try them on and walk around in them for a bit to really get the feel of them. Same with dating. A guy can be good on the outside, sitting there all pretty and good on paper, but when you go out with him all of a sudden you find yourself thinking, "man... you haven't stopped talking about yourself for the last 38 and a half minutes", or after your hour long lunch listening to him talk about his job, his kids, his divorce, and how much he can bench press he asks you to pay for your half of the meal. Ummm.... excuse me? That's when you want to grab your purse and run out the door and swear that you will be single forever.

My point is that you don't really understand how those shoes FEEL in real life until you put them on and walk around in them for awhile.

Take, for example, those really high heels that are so hot. You feel really great just LOOKING at them on the shelf. You think, "Now... those are going to turn some heads!". But, the problem is that you plan your outfit around them, put them on and go out on the town only to find out that they are INCREDIBLY uncomfortable! You want to take them off half way through the night because they are just so impractical. They do turn heads, though! And when the girl in line in front of you for the bathroom tells you how great your shoes are, all you want to say is, "They hurt like a mother! I would rather go barefoot in this disgusting bathroom right now than endure this mind numbing pain another second!". Of course you don't say that, though. You smile politely and bask in the glow of another woman coveting your awesome shoes. Fast forward to the end of the night, you have blisters and sore feet and you don't wear the shoes again.

These hot high heels represent that really hot guy that you lust over. He has a great car, great hair, great chest, real slick sense of style... the problem is that he knows it, though! He asks you out, you say yes because... well... HELLO!!! Why wouldn't you? He's HOT!! He picks you up in his great car, you feel on top of the world, everyone stares at you while you walk into the restaurant together and sit down. Heads are turning and you are basking in the glow. This where it all comes to a screeching halt. He's boring. And kinda dumb. He knows exactly how good looking he is. He is incredibly impractical. You want to grab your purse and run for the door before the entree is even served. Fast forward to the end of the night... He is still beautiful, but you don't go out with him again.

There are many other examples that follow this shoe/men dilemma. Take, for example, the opposite of the hot, high heel... the practical flats. They are comfortable, easy. They are probably orthopedic quality shoes. They are safe. They are NOT exciting.

Come on ladies, we have all been out with this guy! He is safe! He is kinda dorky. He isn't the type you write in your journal about. He is the back up. The one you end up saying yes for a date at the last minute. But... guess what! You don't have blisters at the end of the night! Your feet and heart are perfectly safe.

Here's an example of some other type of "shoes" I've experienced:

The Hiking Boot: He is rugged, he is country, he drives a truck and lives far enough into the country that when needing to pick up something from the grocery store requires "going to town". He is tough, sturdy, stable. He is totally not my style.

The Flip Flop: He's laid back, he's chill, he's totally cool. He is also eternally stuck at age 21. He is perfect for the 21 year old you, though. 

The Green Converse: This is one I have recently come to experience. This is one I never expected to enjoy as much as I do. He is funny, quirky, spontaneous. He is sweet, humble, and loving. He is cute. He is a perfect combination of exciting and practical. 

So... what does this all mean? I have recently come to really love the Green Converse. Someone else may really love the hiking boots. To each their own! Bottom line? Walk around in them for a bit and get a really good idea of what they really are. You may be surprised at the outcome!!

(This metaphor may actually apply for a lot more in life than just men)